New Year. New Bra.

written by Sharen Smith

Resolutions, resolutions, and more resolutions…exercising , dieting , and thinking  positively .  Although these are very important I challenge you to ask, “What resolutions am I making about my wardrobe?”  May I remind you that it’s now 2022, and a new year means that it’s time to purchase a new bra! 

Does this idea fill you with dread?  Are you worried about being poked and prodded by an uncomfortable torture device that you’ll abandon as soon as you walk into your house?  Did you know that 8 out of 10 women wear the wrong bra size? We could all use some guidance and direction in this area. So what should you do if you’re looking for the best bra?  

 I decided to head to Stillwater, Oklahoma where I interviewed Melissa Wiles, the delightful owner of Whisper Intimates Boutique.  Melissa’s business, which has been open since 2014, brings a much needed resource, saving customers a trip to Tulsa or Oklahoma City. 

 Her store is filled with beautiful items, such as underwear, lingerie, and swimsuits! My first order of business was discussing the purchase of a new bra. I sat down in her peaceful office, mesmerized  by her beautiful fish and aquarium. We spoke about the reasons why Melissa decided on this particular career.  

“I come from a family that spans all bra sizes - B cups to O cups - and bra shopping was always a frustrating, miserable experience, for all of us. Nothing ever fit right; we couldn't find the styles we wanted, and we often settled for something causing  lots of pulling, tugging, and pain. I realized that one of the few items Stillwater residents couldn't buy locally was bras. If I was going to open a bra store, I knew I wanted the focus to be on getting the correct fit and styles for the entire family. After a lot of research, we opened Whisper with the goal of being able to fit anyone that walked through our doors.”

One of the first things I asked her was how often one should buy a new bra.  She answered, “Bras should never celebrate a birthday, meaning that after a year, they've given you their best and need to be retired. A bra's life is drastically shortened if it's the only one worn, so it's recommended to have 3-5 bras in your rotation.”  Her bras range in price from $42-$78; however, they always try to keep a healthy selection on the sale rack with bras as low as $20! Although a good fitting bra can be a big investment, it is well worth the support that it will give back to you.

When I asked her about some of the common problems people had when picking out a new bra she related, “A lot of people assume if they are spilling out of a bra, they need a bigger band size. The majority of our customers find out, on their first visit here, that they've been wearing bras that are too small in the cup and too big in the band. I also see a lot of women buy bras based on what their friends and family buy, but we're all built so differently! What works for one woman, doesn't always work for another. It's important to find the style that fits YOUR body.”

 The right fit is key to going home with a smile upon your face.  Melissa reminds us that  “At the end of the day, it doesn't matter how pretty or expensive or "well made" a bra is - if it doesn't fit correctly, it's not going to serve its purpose.”  So it is very important to be fitted for a new bra.  This is where one of Melissa’s expert fitters comes in to help.  

I decided to take the plunge because it had been awhile since I was last fitted.  It is important to be re-measured from time to time.  Life changes, such as gaining or losing weight, having a child or surgery, can change the way a bra fits you.  

Here is what you can expect if you come into Whisper.  A fitter will take you back to a fitting room and ask you to take off your shirt, but leave on your bra. She'll grab a couple of quick measurements.  My fitter expertly measured around my band size and then across the fullest part of my bust.  She made me feel very comfortable.  She then grabbed a bra to fit.

 This likely won't be the style you want, but it's just to get the best size for you. Rarely are measurements ever accurate - they simply provide a starting point to make adjustments. Once the fitter has your size, she discusses what styles you're looking for, then brings you several to try on.  They check the fit on each bra as it's common to be 2-3 different sizes depending on the style and brand. Her fitters want to make sure everything you like fits perfectly! 

From there, your fitter will work to find the perfect bra for you. She will come in and check the fit, adjust the straps, and ask about your concerns. Being a fuller busted woman, I have often found it difficult to find a well-fitting bra.  Even more difficult than that was finding a bra that would be pretty and flattering.  Luckily, Melissa’s Whisper has many styles and sizes, from a size B to a P cup.  

I tried on several beautiful things that I liked, including her sports bras.   Melissa has a wide array of colors and styles.  It felt great to have so much variety to choose from.  I even got to try on one of her most popular new styles.  It was very pretty and flattering!  Melissa said it is one of her favorites, “Right now, I'm loving Samira from Elomi. It's a gorgeous black cut-and-sew style, available up to an N cup. It has semi-sheer cups with beautiful floral embroidery. We've got it on a mannequin in our fitting room and almost everyone has asked to try it on.”    

 I also loved her new bralets. These are one of her new, comfortable styles fitting a range of different sized women.  It was a fire-engine red style, which felt very comfortable and uplifting even without an underwire.   In the end, I purchased a beautiful wine colored, lace underwire bra made by Sculptress. I think it will work well with several different outfit styles.  

I asked Melissa about the best way to take care of my new bra.  She said, “ALWAYS lay flat to dry! I tell my customers, hand washing is always best, but if you're going to throw it in the washing machine, use a lingerie bag to keep the straps from catching on stuff and twisting. Under no circumstances should your bra ever see the inside of a dryer. Heat breaks down the elasticity in a bra and can cause damage to the band, cups, and underwire.” 

 She also cautioned me about wear on the new bra, “While you're excited when you get a new bra and want to wear it every day, don't. Your bra needs a day off to allow the elasticity to relax. Wearing the same bra multiple days in a row stresses the elasticity and shortens the life of the bra.

After this discussion, Melissa took me around the store to show off her lovely merchandise.  While we roamed around the store, I noticed a sign which said:  “Donate a bra…Give a former slave a job.”  This intrigued me, and I asked Melissa about it.  She said that she heard about a program called ‘Free the Girls’.  Based in Colorado, it allows her to collect gently used bras and ship them off to women in 3rd world countries..  These women can sell the bras, which allows them to work, rather than be forced into trafficking. Melissa ships these bras off several times a year. 

 In addition to this, Melissa and I discussed what we do in our spare time.  When Melissa is seeking a challenge, and some inner peace, she builds something with wood.  She inherited her talents and some tools from her dad. I enjoyed seeing some of her pieces that she has been working on including a hand-made dog-pen.   Although she loves this hands-on outlet, Melissa always finds satisfaction helping others.  

 There are many reasons Melissa loves her job, but one of her favorite parts is helping her customers find the perfect bra.  She says, “I love seeing the change in a woman when she gets a bra that fits properly. I've had people cry tears of joy after getting fitted, laugh, hug me - I've seen all sorts of happy reactions from customers;  it makes all the stress of owning a business completely worth it.  

She went on to tell her favorite story.   “I had a mom and her teenage daughter come in to get the daughter fitted. After giving her a bra to try, I came back to the fitting room and heard hysterical laughter. My initial thought was, "Oh, no, the fit must be way off." I poked my head in to check and the mom, crying happy tears, said her daughter had always had to wear two shirts because she spilled out of her bras so much, but this one actually fit! Anytime they'd gone bra shopping before, the experience usually ended with an unhappy purchase and irritated silence on the car ride home. She promised her daughter after they picked out bras they'd go buy her a new wardrobe.”  

Another happy ending at Whisper…a victory for both Melissa and her customers!  If you are ready to find just the right support in the new year, visit Melissa and her experts at 905 S. Main in Stillwater, Oklahoma.  She is open from 10 am to 6 pm,  Monday through Saturday.